I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize
