i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize