OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Everyone says I win the strip club
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
