I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
