haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
