Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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