Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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