K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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