Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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