Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
