i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
