idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize