I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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