there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Randomize
