Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
