just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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