I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
