I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
