You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize