Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
