I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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