i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
i believe in u and ur pee
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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