you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
