i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
