i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
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