So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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