I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
