Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
