In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
