You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
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