i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
how does that bad decision feel?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
