I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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