toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
