ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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