Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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