apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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