I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
