dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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