I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
