Me too!
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
