We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Quick, to the slutcave!
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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