idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize