Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
