Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
