David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Randomize