so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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