Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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