So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i dont even know how to be here
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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