I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
They took my balls.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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