Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
