piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
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