He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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