And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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